We were never meant to live without community. Even God lives in community with Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. A life alone is a life of despair, hopelessness, negative thoughts and possibly self-sabotage through self-inflicted harm. Alcohol, Sex, Drugs, Food, Cutting or Suicide. None of these are a path to healing...only a path of self-destruction.In the preface and forward of the third edition of the Big Book, these statements stood out. If you substitute your addiction in place of the word alcoholic, it might make more sense to you. But for me, an addiction is an addiction no matter what the name.
1. If you have a drinking problem, we hope that you may pause in reading one of the forty-four personal stories and think: "Yes, that happened to me"; or, more important, "Yes, I've felt like that"; or, most important, "Yes, I believe this program can work for me, too."
2. "The only requirement is a desire to stop drinking."
3. "We simply wish to be helpful to those who are afflicted."
4. "... the need for moral inventory, confession of personality defects, restitution of those harmed, helpfulness to others, and the necessity of belief in and dependence upon God."
5. "He suddenly realized that in order to save himself he must carry his message to another alcoholic."
6. "Strenuous work, one alcoholic to another, was vital to permanent recovery."
7. "Yet is is our great hope that all those who have as yet found no answer may begin to find one in the pages of this book and will presently join us on the high road to a new freedom."
And isn't that what Jesus wants us to have? And isn't that what God wants us to experience through His grace and mercy, power and strength? And isn't that how the Holy Spirit counsels us to live day by day seeking God's will for our lives so we can adjust ourselves to it?
When we have trusted confidants, mentors and Christian brothers and sisters who know us (REALLY know us), we can run to them and ask for prayer and wisdom. But ultimately it's between us and God.
I want to be fully recovered from the obesity I've had since I was in Jr. High. I don't want to be a yo-yo anymore. I weighed myself today and the scale showed 205.6 lbs. It reflected what I new to be true. I don't feel that heavy but the scale doesn't lie. It puts reality back into my fantasy life thinking I can do all things without accountability. Wrong-oh!! Back on track I go because:
A. I want to be set free from the bondage of food.
B. I want to be able to hear His whispers clearly and without interruption.
C. I want to fulfill the desires He has placed in my heart to help people.
D. I'm not perfect and I will make mistakes. But with each mistake comes learning something new and I want to remain teachable, not with my fists up in the air.
E. I'm tired of the struggle to do this my own way. So I pray for a sponsor or a spiritual guide who can help me. I believe I am being led to one of the women in our Celebrate Recovery group. She and I share a common past so there's a connection that doesn't need to be worked on. It's already established.
What are you going to do for yourself today? How will you handle your addiction(s)? I don't know the answers but I do know where God has lead me to begin. Read the book Alcoholics Anonymous. Not only will it help me with my struggles and addictions but it will also help me continue healing the pain of the relationship with my Dad and his death. His alcoholism poisoned our family, poisoned me. I don't want to live with that poison-ness residue anymore. I want to bury it with him.
In order to come full circle I have to lay down each broken piece before my Holy Maker. And with each piece comes feelings. And with each feeling comes the need for community. And in each community is someone picked out just for you to help you get through your junk.
God innately designed us to lean on Him and one another.
